The Facts To Surviving A Contested Divorce

Every divorce is painful, but when it comes down to a contested divorce, the pain can spill over into all aspects of your life. You've got a number of calls to make, not the least being, what kind of divorce are you wanting? Will mediation work or will you apply to the courts? So as to keep this distressing situation from curving out of control, there are some things that you can do to prepare for the imminent situation. You need a good lawyer, you need to document what you need out of the divorce, you need to make arrangements for the care and support of your children, and you need to guard your private psychological fitness.

In a contested divorce, you could lose everything, your home, your youngsters and all of your possessions. Obviously, it's important to protect your assets. You want a good divorce lawyer. This is one of those times where it is not a good idea to consult pals for information. Someone that went thru an uncontested divorce hasn't got the same viewpoint as a person who must survive a vicious battle. Find a lawyer who makes a speciality of contested divorces, and be certain to check their record. Ask how many divorces they have handled and whether they have actual court experience.


It's a great idea to prepare for a contested divorce by creating some lists. If you came into the wedding with multiple financial assets, list and document all you can. Remember that if you are suing for custody of the children, you'll want to document what you want for child support. And if you're looking for spousal support, you want to have information available about why you need this. Did you give up a job when you married? Do you plan to return to college to start a better career? All of these items will be significant when you meet with your divorce lawyer.

Also , when you meet with your lawyer, or go before a judge, they may ask painful questions. You may want to write down some of the issues with your marriage so you can refer to this written record. Questions about whether your other half was unfaithful or whether there were incidents of abuse, either physical or emotional, can bring up feelings you assumed you had already recovered from. If one or the other person in the marriage was financially rash, this can also be a problem that brings up agonizing feelings. Writing down your replies will allow you to answer these questions calmly and obviously, without getting involved in recriminations.

This can be especially useful when youngsters are concerned. A contested divorce can be savage for youngsters. Both parties need to come to a deal about the best way to help their youngsters through the divorce. Issues that must be resolved include custody arrangements, child support, and even choices about whether counseling is necessary or not.

Talking of counseling, do not forget that you might need counselling yourself. Don't assume that just because you're going thru the method quietly and totally, you're not suffering. A contested divorce could cause emotional issues for years. Think about getting counseling from a consultant with a specialty in divorce. Or join a support group. Not only will the support group help you adjust to your new way of living, but you'll be able to meet folks who understand exactly what you're going through.Surviving a contested divorce is a complicated process. But if you approach it with a definite plan, you will find the present is easier. Get a good lawyer, document your financial situation, note down your memories, and support your children. And remember to get support yourself to make it thru this heavy time.